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Monday, Dec. 29, 2014

George Carlin, R.I.P.

Posted Wednesday, June 25, 2008, at 1:17 PM

Philosophy is the pursuit of wisdom by a means of speculation and beliefs. Most philosophers have a knack for getting right to the point in very few words.

Plato -- "Philosophy begins in wonder."

Socrates -- "The unexamined life is not worth living."

Aristotle -- "All men by nature desire to know."

Descartes -- "I think, therefore I am."

George Carlin -- "Always do whatever's next."

Known primarily for his comedy, George Carlin often stumbled upon the truth and had enough balls to say it out loud. He was a philosopher for our troubled times.

A dozen George Carlin observations listed below for your philosophical pleasure:

1) I believe the money I make belongs to me, not some mid level government functionary be it Democrat or Republican.

2) I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.

3) I think if you're too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.

4) I believe owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.

5) I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.

6) I don't hate the rich and I don't pity the poor.

7) I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.

8) I've never owned a slave, nor was a slave. I didn't wander 40 years in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you. So shut up already.

9) Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

10) Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.

11) If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.

12) Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

George Carlin departed for the Great Beyond on June 22, 2008.

Rest in Peace.

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Quote for the Day -- "There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls." George Carlin

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Boldly Going Nowhere
Bret Burquest
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Bret Burquest is a former award-winning columnist for The News (2001-2007) and author of four novels. He has lived in Minneapolis, Los Angeles, Miami, Atlanta, Kansas City, Memphis and the middle of the Arizona desert. After a life of blood, sweat and tears in big cities, he has finally found peace in northern Arkansas where he grows tomatoes, watches sunsets and occasionally shares the Secrets of the Universe (and beyond) with the rest of the world.
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